unwanted
a poem about grief
Unwanted
I sought out hell
For something to do.
Its front door
Old vines and bones
Blooms and black opals
Gave me back my grief.
Loss grips my chest and turns to
Anger, fear into the
Molton foundation.
Writhing from underneath,
A snake cocks its head
Its mouth holds a ruby
Made of the most attention
You ever got as a child.
Bend lightning bars back
The beast.
Speaks only madness,
Inescapable bliss,
At your ceaseless suffering.
Smiling horror
Is her name
Grins and unleashes
Bird and bear
Tearing through treads
And snipping futures away
With each snap
Of cauterized jaws.
Mossy green patch
Of yesterday, down into
Infinity where you
Stare, unaware as you
Wither from inside.
Body at the altar,
Marital slaughter,
Loving malice at your back,
Whispering and lying.
Submit the body lower than
Dirt ugly maggots
And lily-white truth.
Trying to pretend the pale petals
Are recompense for
Waterlogged corpses.
Intestines stinking in the sun,
Needless cruelty,
The dead slipping sideways,
Like coals into the cradle
Like slain boar ready for the
Maw, into the cogs
Skeletons crunch as tendons snap.
And then, an anomaly.
Stray shining certainty.
Fox-faced death.
Metal and stone.
You are
So small.
Step into the darkness,
Face your fears,
Feel them destroy you,
Bleed for your hatred,
Weep for the past,
And water the
Last blossom
From the
Goddess
Rebirth.
A flash of red light,
Tender bud poking through viscera.
Standing at the edge of oblivion,
Wracked with joy.
Singing in the din,
“I was born,
Doomed to die,
I will die again.”
“I suffered life,
Lived to thrive,
I will live again.”
“I lingered here,
A state too shy,
I shall begin again.”